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2006-09-16T04:30:16Z

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'''Bono''' is the superhero of the pulp fiction comic series [[U2]]. He fights off crime, leopards, and Britons with his guitar-shaped arm of fury. The series is quite popular in countries that have people, such as America, Ireland, and Western [[Antarctica]]. His real name is [[Paul Hewson]], although it was destroyed in a radioactive experiment.

==Biography==
Bono was born on September 31st, 1956. His father, through a series of time travel mishaps explained in Episode #23, is a packet of mustard. His mother's origins are not yet known. He graduated from A Real High School in [[Wisconsin]] after earning a masters degree in [[Musicology]] from the University of College. His current whereabouts are unknown, as he is currently on the run from the President of the [[Untied States]].

==Supporting Characters==
In Bono's tag-a-long crew of fighters, [[U2]] has a few supporting characters. These include:
===[[The Edge]]===
Real name "Dave Evans", The Edge is a rather one dimensional character, rescued from a [[Borg Cube]]. His super power is the ability to shoot drums out of his eyes.

===[[Adam Clayton]]===
Real name "Adam", was killed off in the third season pilot episode, even though it's not a TV series. You should dislike this character, as he may be French.

===[[Larry Mullen]] Jr===
Real name "[[Roseanne]]", Larry is best known for casting a ring into a mountain during a crossover series titled "The Lord of the Rings".

==Notable History==
* 1954: Bono dies while valiantly flying a mission over Berlin, not realizing that the airlift was six years prior.
** 1955: Bono is born, one year after his death and a full year before his birth. His reputation as a showoff begins to spread.
** 1956: Bono is born again. This was a blatant violation of the intergalactic law of the time, but nobody noticed because [[Ireland]] was still completely underground at the time. It was also the subject of the highly controversial Episode #-1, which was also responsible for introducing such apocrypha as [[Turtle|space turtles]].
* 1984: Adam expends the last of his three wishes, granted for releasing [[Sting]] from his imprisonment in a magic lamp, to get a #1 single for his namesake band, [[Steely Dan]]. The wish is accepted, and a song from 1980 -- "Five White Swallows" -- becomes #1 on the Billboard charts throughout 1893. Adam gives up, gets drunk, and becomes a Korean woman for seven weeks.
** 1984, attempt 2: Adam gets drunk and arranges to marry [[Elvis Costello]], who at that time is still Elvis. The Edge consults U.S. [[Supreme Court]] [[Pot v. Kettle|Chief Justice]] Rev. Al Sharpton, Ph.D., Esq., Inc., who, seeing an opportunity to [[Years|strike a blow]] to the reputation of his rival Alex "The Graham" Bell, imposes a ban on "weeks" for five weeks. This gives Larry time to set a [[pie]] trap for Elvis. The laser gun fires as expected, and the problem is solved. Adam sobers up in a local opium den.

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 * 1984: Adam expends the last of his three wishes, granted for releasing [[Sting]] from his imprisonment in a magic lamp, to get a #1 single for his namesake band, [[Steely Dan]]. The wish is accepted, and a song from 1980 -- "Five White Swallows" -- becomes #1 on the Billboard charts throughout 1893. Adam gives up, gets drunk, and becomes a Korean woman for seven weeks.
 ** 1984, attempt 2: Adam gets drunk and arranges to marry [[Elvis Costello]], who at that time is still Elvis. The Edge consults U.S. [[Supreme Court]] [[Pot v. Kettle|Chief Justice]] Rev. Al Sharpton, Ph.D., Esq., Inc., who, seeing an opportunity to [[Years|strike a blow]] to the reputation of his rival Alex "The Graham" Bell, imposes a ban on "weeks" for five weeks. This gives Larry time to set a [[pie]] trap for Elvis. The laser gun fires as expected, and the problem is solved. Adam sobers up in a local opium den.
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