User:BAILOPAN (What)

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Revision as of 11:35, 14 January 2006 by Twilight Suzuka (talk | contribs) (What to do when you see a Wild BAILOPAN)
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BAILOPAN, official leader of the AMX Mod X developement team, as of his overthrow of the SniperBeamer. He is ready to move to a more defensible location


When BAILOPAN was small, his village had to combat a giant nine tailed fox. They decided to simply seal it into a small child, so that they wouldn't have to deal with it for a while, and they could scorn the child. That child...was BAILOPAN. Er...Naruto. Sorry.

BAILOPAN, raised by wolves and ...demons... quickly raised high into the ranks of Microsoft, eventually being thrown down from the tallest Microsoft building, so that Bill Gates could continue to keep his unholy regime all fo rhimself. Hoping that the fall would cripple or even kill the unholy child, Bill Gates also threw pennies at him from hundreds of yard in the air, in an attempt to kill of BAILOPAN.

He failed.

After several mission impossible -esq missions, battling the evil Microsoft empire for control of their megahurtz, BAILOPAN decided that the only way to deal with this was to forget it. Using his chakra, he burninated the part of his brain with the memories, thus rendering him intoa normal child.

Until, of course, the day he found Admin Mod...


BAILOPAN has several key abilities:

  • Ability to outrun speeding trains.
  • Can dodge bullets at will.
  • Chuck Norris is afraid of him
  • He can fly!
    • Wait, that is SuperMan
  • He can break code like no tomarrow!
  • Ability to dodge deadlines in a single bound!
  • Can teleport to a location where people cannot bug him about the new AMX Mod X version


  • Timers illude him
  • He is confused by bright lights
  • Has an insatiable taste for megahurtz
  • Number one annoying idiot ninja
    • Sorry, Naruto again.
  • Can be lured with Yams
  • Has an insatiable lust for turtles

Battling a Tame BAILOPAN

Due to his demonic powers, as well as his l33t coding skillz, BAILOPAN is a challenging opponent.

Battling in the physical realm

  • BAILOPAN's weaknesses
    • Yams
    • Turtles
    • Breasts
  • BAILOPAN's strengths
    • Fire
    • Wind
    • Beating-you-to-death-with-a-stick

Battling in the digital realm

  • BAILOPAN's weaknesses
    • Timers
    • Abstract Data Types
    • Breasts
  • BAILOPAN's strengths
    • Dodging deadlines
    • Abusive commentary
    • Beating-you-to-death-with-bugs

What to do when you see a Wild BAILOPAN

Kiss your ass goodbye, because you sir, are dead.

As Gaben once said: “Bailopan scares me shitless”

~ Gabe Newell on BAILOPAN

Twilight Suzuka 12:19, 14 January 2006 (EST)